Saturday, March 21, 2009


After spending two and one half years prostrate to the pressure cooker that was my day to day at my former employ, I've discovered one beautiful and magnificent can go home again.

Six years after setting off on our absolutely astounding adventure abroad (and the subsequent egregious error that was Atlanta), we're back...back not only in Colorado, we're back living in the Rockies at 8,500 feet. Beyond just a number, that elevation feels so damned good as it's lifted us up out of the muck and the mire of where we came from.

For far too long, after suffering humiliation after humiliation all in the name of providing a home for my family on a single income, the
reality and the realization set in that a home just isn't a home without a whole family in it. With a father who's either absent all the time for work, or pegged to the nines with stress and strain when he is around...It's just a building where you hang your hat in between work days. What are we worth as parents? What dollar figure do we attach not only to time with our children, but our self respect?

Respect begins with you. And when those you work for have little to none for themselves, when they despise their lives and anyone around them who shows any sign of true it really all that surprising that misery loves company? And as easy as it would be to be angry, truth be told, I feel more pity for them than pissed off. When the only thing you value in your life is the contents of your wallet, I can't feel anything but sadness for you.

We (and I mean "We" as in the collective of mankind) are so much more than the bottom line of our bank accounts, the cars we drive, or our fucking wristwatches. It's sad that some people have come so far in this life, but have still yet to realize that when this journey is said and done, all that truly matters is the people we've loved and those who have loved us.

And as far as the suburban slough through the mindless masses crammed onto the highways all trudging through this life in pursuit of a bigger paycheck, a bigger house, bigger SUVs and bigger ulcers? That's never been and will never be how this boy does his business.

Still being a relatively new parent, did I succumb to the pressures of providing? I did, without question. Regardless of the real cost to those I value most.

I will not make that mistake again. I am home. And I remember not only this place and how it makes me feel so alive...I remember who I am and why I'm here.

i've seen it rainin' fire in the sky. i know he'd be a poorer man if he never saw an eagle fly.


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